Wedding

MALAY WEDDING

A Malay wedding is usually performed when either one or both spouses are Malay. Malaysian law defines a Malay person as a Muslim. The traditional wedding ceremony is in two parts. The first part is the akad nikah (marriage contract), which is the legal and religious part of the wedding. The second part is the bersanding (enthronement), which is a family celebration. It is usual for the two parts to be celebrated over two days. However, it is becoming common for there to be a gap between the parts of the wedding, during which the couple are legally married, but saving up for an elaborate bersanding. In cases where the couple have family spread around the world, a number of bersanding may be held in different countries to allow everyone to wish the couple well.

ADAT MERISIK

The adat merisik (asking ceremony, or more literally 'spying custom') is the traditional Malay system for arranging marriages. When it is time for a young man to get married, his family will look around to identify a number of potential brides. Nowadays, the man might suggest to his family who he would like them to consider, and it may be that a romantic link already exists between the man and woman. Having decided upon one particular woman, the merisik, or investigation process, takes place.
For this ceremony one or more representatives (wakil) of the man's family pay a friendly visit to the family of the woman whom they have in mind as his potential bride. The visit is purely for the purpose of further investigation, and it gives the visitors the chance to see the woman. A hint will be given to her parents regarding the purpose of the visit, and their reaction will be assessed. The woman's parents may also give the visitors some idea as to whether or not their daughter would be interested in the match. The merisik does not constitute a formal proposal. Following the visit both sides can begin to think more seriously about the possibility or otherwise of a marriage. It is possible that no progress may take place, and the man's parents or representatives will then look for another possible bride.

ADAT BERTUNANG

The adat bertunang (engagement custom) is normally held at the bride's home.

AKAD NIKAH

A Malay wedding proper begins with the akad nikah (marriage contract) ceremony. The groom signs the marriage contract and agrees to provide the bride with a mas kahwin (mahar,literally 'marriage gold' in form of money or goods or anything as requested by the bride).It is opposite to dowry where the mas khawin is paid by the groom to the bride. The mas khawin is a symbol to show that the men is willing and are prepared to build a family with the lady he chose to get married to. The contract signing is done before a religious official and is accompanied by prayer.
If the bersanding is to take place the next day, the couple's hands are dyed with henna during the berinai besar (great henna-ing) ceremony. The bride's hair is also trimmed, eyebrows shaped and make-up applied by a beautician, known as the mak andam. Then the bride puts on her tudung (hijab or headscarf) to cover their hair and a selendang, or embroidered and beaded shawl over that. A crown is also placed on top of the shawl. If the bersanding does not take place on the day following the nikah, these preparation customs are delayed until the bersanding.

BERSANDING

The bersanding (enthronement) ceremony begins with the groom's procession with friends, relatives, musicians and people waving bunga manggar (palm blossom) to meet the bride. Often various good-humoured attempts are made to waylay or stop the groom from getting to the bride. The main part of the bersanding involves the seating of the bridal couple on a dais and sprinkling them with yellow rice and scented water by family members, relatives and guests as a sign of blessing. Each guest will receive a bunga telur (egg flower), a decorated egg with a fabric flower, as a sign of fertility. The couple are considered royalty for the day, and so various royal customs are performed for them, including musicians playing court music and 'bodyguards' performing a display of pencak silat (traditional Malay martial arts).

INDIAN WEDDING

                                                    
 Indian weddings are very bright events, filled with ritual and celebration, that continue for several days. They are generally not small affairs, with anywhere between 100 to 10,000 people attending. Oftentimes it is possible that many of the attendees are unknown to the bride and groom themselves. Though most Indian marriages are arranged, some couples in urban areas have what are known as "love marriages", where the partners decide to marry each other without family involvement or assistance. The traditional Indian wedding is more about two families being brought together socially, with much less emphasis on the individuals involved.
Many of the wedding customs are common among Hindus, Jains, Sikhs and even Muslims. They are a combination of local, religious and family traditions.

Wedding traditions vary across religion, caste, ethnicity, language, region, etc. Traditional Indian weddings are generally structured into pre-wedding ceremonies, ,wedding day ceremonies (consisting of the Baraat, the Varmala and the Phere), and the Vidaai.

Kanyadaan

                                          

During kanyadaan, the bride’s parents give their daughter away in marriage. The groom makes three promises – to be just (dharma), earn sufficiently to support his family, (artha) and love his wife (kama). He repeats these vows thrice in the presence of Agni (the sacred fire) and all who are gathered there.

 Bariksha

                                           

Bariksha is when the bride's parents have informally shown intentions that they want a particular groom, and the groom and his family have agreed. Retracting at the end of this stage is frowned upon but is acceptable. Once the wedding has been decided on by both sides, the bride's family goes and does Badcheka/ Bariksha of the groom. This is when the bride's father and brothers go to the groom's side with sweets (including a coconut) and some pooja items like rice and turmeric. This ceremony is a token gesture to confirm the alliance and signifies that the groom is now "taken" and can no longer look for other prospective brides.

 Tilak

                                           

Tilak involves the bride's parents traveling to the groom's family home to formalise the relationship. A large feast is organised by the groom's family to celebrate this occasion. Only a nominal number of members of the bride's family are present (usually only very close relatives, often in tens of numbers). Typically, the female marriage proposal is very rare.

Byaha Haath

                                            

Byaha Haath: This ceremony signifies the purifying of the mind, body and soul of bride and groom. This daytime ceremony prepares both of them for the nuptials. 'Uptan' is a mixed paste of sandalwood, turmeric and rose water which is applied by seven unmarried female members of the families to the faces, hands and feet of the bride and groom. After this ceremony the bride and the groom are not allowed to step outside the house before the actual wedding.

Chinese Wedding

                                                                                                  

Chinese Wedding Customs & Rituals

In Chinese legend, the fatherly God-in-the-moonlight ties a red string around the ankles of the man and woman who are supposed to be husband and wife someday.  Thus, no matter how far apart they are, they will eventually get married

Proposal & Betrothal

                                                
Two families pick an auspicious date as the Betrothal Day.  This is a formal meeting between the parents of the perspective bride and groom. The groom's family presents various proposal gifts that represents fertility and prosperity in Chinese Culture, which is also known as "Grand Gift".  Thus, the two are considered officially engaged.  

Wedding Day Ceremony

                                                 
On the day of the wedding, two families performs "hair dressing" ritual and "capping" ritual for the bride and groom respectively. Then the groom sets out to the bride's home, and he will inevitably be blocked at her door by her friends, and the bridesmaids will play door game with the groom and his attendants.  The bride and groom will then leave her home and proceed to meet the groom's parents for Tea Ceremony.  The wedding date ceremony ends with a feast which features elaborate Chinese wedding food.

Pre-Wedding Ritual

                                           

After the betrothal  meeting, both families will make announcement to their relatives and friends by sending out  "Double Happiness Cakes" along with invitations.  The bride's family then prepares dowry and give a list of the dowries to the groom's family. The groom's family performs "setting bridal bed" ritual...  The groom's family decorates the bridal house for the wedding, while the bride's family prepares household accessories, mostly bedding and dining necessities, for the new home. 

Wedding Night Ritual

                                               

The night of the wedding, the bridal room will lit dragon and phoenix candle to drive away the evil spirit, the newlyweds will drink wine from two cups tied together with a red string, arms crossed from each other. This is the formal wedding vow in Chinese culture. Then the bride will be offered dumplings that's boiled half-raw.  The pronunciation of "raw" is the same as giving birth to children, a indication of family prosperity.